First off, very important… 
YOU SUCK, METS!
HEY ZAMBRANO — NEXT TIME GO NINE!
WHAT'SA MATTER CASTRO? ONLY FIVE RBI?
WILLIE, YOU LACK PRESCIENCE NOT INSTALLING MIKE JACOBS AT FIRST FOUR-AND-A-HALF MONTHS AGO!
WRIGHT AND REYES, THERE'S NO GUARANTEE THAT THE AMAZING PROGRESS YOU'RE MAKING AND GENERAL EXCELLENCE YOU'RE DISPLAYING VIRTUALLY EVERY GAME WON'T OCCASIONALLY BE INTERRUPTED FOR MISTAKES THAT WILL EVENTUALLY LEAD TO GROWTH, “EVENTUALLY” BEING A CONCEPT THAT I AS A METS FAN CAN'T UNDERSTAND BECAUSE I WANT MORE, MORE, MORE NOW, NOW, NOW!!!
GRAVES! KOO! HEREDIA FOR THAT MATTER! WHERE ARE YOU SO I CAN BLAME YOU FOR SOMETHING! MY OVERREACTION REQUIRES AN IMMEDIATE OUTLET!
YOU SUCK, METS!
YOUR SEASON-HIGH FIVE-GAMES-OVER MILESTONE SHOULD HAVE COME SOONER!
Actually, I totally mean the last one, but the important thing remains helping the Mets feel at home when they're on the road. Therefore we must continue to heap unreasonable amounts of irrational abuse on them. I've now begun two away games by booing the first pitch (to my favorite player , no less, a bit of shared sacrifice to reinforce that we're all in this together), and the Mets have won them both. Seeing as how this is the first two-game winning streak the Mets have put together west of the Mississippi all season (7-14 out yonder), I do insist that making our boys feel as if they are at Shea — where they are cheerlessly chastised despite posting an outstanding winning percentage — is what's doing the trick.
Couldn't be that they were good enough to do this all along and just needed a little boost from the likes of Jacobs and Castro and a refreshed Victor Diaz.
Nah, that would be too easy, giving them the credit.
Maybe the BOB has more Shealike qualities than one could infer from watching it on TV or even visiting it. Well, Shea is next to an airport and Bank One Ballpark has been likened to an airplane hangar, but that's all I can come up with. I was lucky enough to visit the BOB in its second season, 1999, back when Joel Lugo was basking in the Valley of the Sun and gracious enough to host several of his East Coast buddies for a Mets-Diamondbacks NLDS preview . What I remember about the facility was that it was very chilly (or “brisk” as noted Mets fan Dr. Fred Bunz aptly put it). Phoenix itself was like a thousand degrees, a fact that baked one and all the second they tore the roof off the sucker after the game. But inside, they kept it Colorado-cool. Howie and Gary reported Tuesday night that they've installed new grass in there since the Showalter days and have maintained a warmer temperature to assure its long-term health.
Warm enough for the Mets, apparently: two out, no longer alone in last and, finally, five games over .500 for the first time since gas was a dollar a gallon, The Captain & Tennille were on the charts and James K. Polk was in the White House.
Or so it seems.
Speaking of grass, occasionally it's browner on the other side of the fence no matter how arid you believe it to be in your yard. Channeling Chauncey Gardner? No, Gotham Baseball.