Five games into the second year of the long-dormant Mets-Phillies rivalry, I think we can identify what one of these babies feels like.

Torture. Total torture. Put away the waterboarding. Bring on Jayson Werth. That'll make 'em scream.

Here's a Mets-Phillies game in digest form:

The Mets get a lead. The Mets fans get confident. The Phillies lurk. [...]

Now that I've had a chance to settle into the new season, I've reached the point where I can stop watching baseball so anxiously, investing every out and every pitch with more intensity than it or I can bear for very long. Which is a relief: Until October comes, you can't watch baseball that way. [...]