Can Willie Bench Everybody?

Yes, Jose Reyes should run out all ground balls, all fly balls, all fair balls, all foul balls. Yes, Willie Randolph should slap even his superstars on the wrist and nail their buttocks to the bench when they fail to put one foot in front of the other. Good character-building exercise there in the eighth. Randolph was firm afterwards and Reyes — steaming and snorting in the dugout to the point where I was worrying for his (and our) future — was genuinely contrite.

If we are to assume that Reyes will hustle, take nothing for granted and live up to his manager's work ethic…and if we are to continue to assume that if Jose Reyes can take a one-inning benching, his teammates can receive the same message, then we can ultimately assume our Mets will conduct themselves like professionals.

'Cause they're sure playing like a bunch of goddamn amateurs lately.

All hail Wandy Rodriguez and take nothing away from his Friday night, but wow have the Mets forgotten how to do everything again. Mike Pelfrey's progress is absolutely snailish and painful to sit through. In another era he'd be just now reaching Binghamton since this is only his second professional season. Come to think of it, why is he pitching in the bigs already? Oh. Right. Everybody's injured.

This was Pelf's best start of the season and it was still a grim scene, baby. Young Michael has almost never shown any proclivity for escaping a jam unscathed, certainly not more than one in any game. Maybe Rodriguez wasn't going to be bested, but you gotta hang tougher than Pelfrey does. I'm trying to remember he's a child, he's a neophyte, he has talent. But my patience a thin commodity this week.

As for the Mets' offense, Reyes' barely fair tapper (even Mike Lamb seemed surprised it wasn't called foul, practically walking the ball to first as if he thought Larry Vanover might want it back) was one of the better hit balls of the night. Maybe Jose didn't run because he didn't believe the magic Wandy would give up even a 45-footer to anybody in a NEW YORK uniform. One double, three singles, one walk, all registered in different innings was the extent of our production. Easley's slide to break up a DP was the best thing I saw all evening.

Just as well Jose lollygagged. If he had taken off for first in the eighth, there'd be nothing to remember from this game at all.

Here's wishing a helluva lot more luck to our friend Dan Ziegler, Lone Star Met himself, who's going to be taking in the final two games of this series up close and personal. His guide to watching the Mets at Minute Maid Park is a must-read. We can only hope what he's driving east from the Metroplex to witness is must-see.